I Love It!

Remember the old McDonald's jingle "I'm loving it?"  That is how I feel about being on stage performing.  I am currently in rehearsals for a production of Carmen with a local opera company, Finger Lakes Opera.  I am not singing a lead, or even a comprimario role; I am in the ensemble.  While that may not sound compelling, the amazing thing about it for me is how I feel during and after rehearsals, even when talking to people about how rehearsals are going.  I am so full of energy, life, and excitement, that I can barely contain myself.  This is how I know what I am supposed to be doing with my life.

We are reading and discussing The Jesuit Guide to (Almost) Everything by Rev. James Martin, S.J. in a young adult group that I facilitate at my church.  This is my second time through the book and the primary thing that has struck me both times through is that God plants your deepest desires in your heart and they are God's way of showing you what you should be doing in life.  There has rarely been much question about the desires on my heart, but it seems to have magnified in intensity over the last couple of years.  I now not only desire to be performing, but I long for it.  When I am not in production I often feel like something is missing in my life.

Part of this new excitement when performing comes from my experience last year.  Since my time with the New York Opera Studio I have continually become more comfortable in my body on stage.  This ability to open up on stage has allowed me to really explore things and let me fall into the characters I am portraying, even in an ensemble situation.  While rehearsing for Carmen, I am also preparing for my debut as Ferrando in Detroit next month in Mozart's Cosi Fan Tutte.  These months of being able to immerse myself in the world of opera have shown me how I need my life to be if I am to be truly content with my occupation.  My goal for the coming "year" is to find more ways to envelop myself in this world and make this desire a reality.

The Waiting

The waiting is the hardest part.  I have done all of my auditions for the year (although I am trying to do one more in May), and now there is nothing left to do but wait for the last of them to get back to me.  It has been another year of progress, but another year of frustration as well.  It feels as though I have gone nowhere.  The next step has not yet been made.  In some respects I don't know if I know what the next step truly is.  I continue to work on my technique, characterization, languages, etc., but I am still not making that next level.  I read something today that sparked a thought in me.  It was a Lenten reflection from Fr. Robert Barron and he said this:  

"I suppose we human beings have always been in a hurry, but modern people especially seem to want what they want, when they want it.  We are driven, determined, goal-oriented, fast-moving.  I, for one, can't stand waiting.

But is it possible that we are made to wait because the track we are on is not the one God wants for us?  Maybe we're forced to wait because God wants us to seriously reconsider the course we've charted, to stop hurtling down a dangerous road."

This struck me hard today.  

I have been on this course for about a decade now, and am content to continue on this path if it is what I am truly called to do.  The waiting, though, is unbearable.  

I don't often talk about my faith on this blog, but in the last few years, months, and especially weeks, I have become more and more deeply ingrained in my faith.  I pray for my vocation as a singer daily, and I see affirmations of it often.  There are other times, like currently, where I feel as though I am in a void.  It is interesting that this Lent, my prayer life has been flashing bright neon signs at me that say "DETACHMENT;" perhaps this is what I need to do in order for my true vocation in singing to shine forth.  Detach myself from the desire.  Detach myself from the pride associated with pursuing this career.  Detach myself from the thinking that I am solely responsible for my success in this field.  

New Year, New Plans

Merry Christmas and Happy New Year!

It has been a few months since I have updated the world about my life, I apologize.  The end of 2013 marked some important changes in my singing life.  In the most recent audition season, I sent out nearly 25 applications and was granted five auditions.  I am still waiting to hear back from some of those auditions, but as of right now I have no offers on the table.  In the interest of understanding my situation and furthering my career along, I had a meeting with my voice teacher to discuss the coming year and what we can do.  The answer, primarily, has been to change my repertoire around.  Specifically he told me, "You have to start doing things that other singers struggle with."  With that statement I have officially moved into the Bel Canto repertoire.  My future repertoire finds itself sitting a lot higher, but ultimately feels fairly comfortable in my voice at this point.  I am looking forward to the next year with this repertoire and the possibilities it may bring.

Along those same lines, this year I have decided to really increase my work level towards my career.  This includes more lessons, coachings, study/practice time, and hopefully more performing.  Part of this also concerns my health.  I am about 60 pounds overweight and need to work to lower that number considerably before next season.  All of this change will involve making a new daily schedule to accommodate everything I have to do on a give day, and planning out what I need to work on when I do work.  This year is the year of "working smart."

In the language aspect of my life I have somewhat let that part of my life linger for a while.  This technically should be my year for Russian, but I am contemplating going back and trying to further either my French or German.  This is partly due to practicality and partly due to money.  We shall see where my heart ultimately leads me.  

Summer Opera Antics!

I have just returned from the first of my two summer programs.  This program was truly focused on the acting and interpretive aspect of the art form.  I found everything about this program to be wonderful.  Firstly the people involved, both staff and participants were all wonderful people.  It was nice to be in a setting where there was very little to no drama for the entirety of the program.  I have made some wonderful friends who I hope to keep in touch with and follow their careers as we move along in our lives.  Additionally I have made great professional contacts with people whom I respect and have already gleaned a lot of knowledge from.  Apart from the social aspects, I also discovered many things about myself and ways to open myself up to the audience where I feel I am truly performing and not just singing the notes on the page anymore.  One of the added bonuses to this program was that we were able to learn and explore some of the beautiful music that is the Russian repertoire.  This is such a lush area of music that is just beginning to see more light and I hope that it becomes as much of a mainstay in repertory houses as its Italian, French and German counterparts are.

My next program starts on Wednesday in Buffalo with performances on Sunday.  For this program, I will be singing Rossini's Count Almaviva with a very talented class.  I know this program will be different than the one I just finished, but I hope and pray that the people involved are equally as loving as those I have just left.  If you are interested in coming to these performances, please find me on Twitter @JPike1028 or like me on Facebook and I will post updates and dates and location of my upcoming performances!

Thank you to everyone for your continued prayers and support!

2012 in Review, and a Look Ahead!

I have decided this year to go down to one post per month here.  This way, my posts should be of a little more substance.  This post is going to be my year in review post, with a brief update on this year, as well.

This past year has been one of great growth vocally.  I have become completely comfortable in the tenor tessitura, although the high notes do still give me some trouble in performance, due to nerves.  I have built a reliable Ab and A natural in the last year, and I am working currently on solidifying my Bb and working towards the B natural.  Every day I feel things becoming more and more comfortable and I am beginning to identify with my tenor voice.  The fruits of this year have represented themselves through my first contracted role, a comprimario role which I will be singing in March with Rochester Lyric Opera.

This summer I will be moving out of the Rochester area in search of more opportunities for both me and my wife.  In preparation for this move, I will be planning and performing a recital in the late spring or early summer.  I have not yet decided what the repertoire will be, but I am leaning towards a mixed program of predominantly French and German repertoire, with some Italian thrown in to pay tribute to the area of Rochester I live in, which is practically all Italian.

My year of German was ultimately a success, too.  I did not get to the level that I was hoping to in the language, but I do feel comfortable in basic day-to-day conversation and feel that I would be able to get around the country were I to go there tomorrow.

This was my first language I had studied without any prior knowledge, and I feel that my method worked very well.  I have found that it is difficult for me to keep up my studies as consistently as is necessary to really achieve fluency in a year.  This is in part due to my schedule and the fact that most of my studying was happening while I was at work between the hours of three and five in the morning.  A number of times, it was too difficult to stay awake while studying at this time of day, and this ultimately led me to days and weeks where I would not study.  I also found that I do not need to invest in the products I was investing in to learn a language.  I am convinced that I can achieve my desired level in a language simply by using LingQ and speaking with anyone I come across who happens to speak my target language.  This combination of input and output simultaneously has been extremely useful to me and I believe this is how I will approach the rest of my language studies.

This year, my mission is to reactivate and improve my Spanish language skills.  I studied Spanish for three years in high school and was fairly comfortable speaking with my friend from the Dominican my first years of college.  I have since not really used the language much.  While my Spanish is still passable because of my Italian and English, I would like to become more comfortable in the language so that I may use it to my advantage in the day job market.

My goal for this year is to learn 8,000 words of Spanish on LingQ and reach a high-intermediate level in the language.  In following the 1.6 ratio I have discussed before, this would translate to about 5,000 word families known.  In order to give a better idea of this level, the average native English speaker knows approximately 17,000 word families; so this will get me about a third of the way to native fluency, and should make me very comfortable in the language, assuming I speak as much as I should with friends and at meetups, etc.

This is going to be a very challenging year for me, but I look forward to it.  I anticipate a lot of growth this year, both in my language abilities and in my singing and performing.

Audition Season is Here!

I received some exciting news the other day when I opened my e-mail.  I have been granted my first audition for a Young Artist Program (YAP) as a tenor.  This is wonderful news for me, especially since the first two responses I got from other programs were declines.  I read an interview of Rockwell Blake a few years back in which he stated:

"There’s no cushion.  You start out with nothing, you have nothing, and there’s no such thing as an investment in property or something like a dentist would have to go through.  You move to New York, take an apartment and go to everything you can go to, and shell out a lot of money to pianists and coaches, which is necessary.  One needs to study, regardless, and you have to shell out money for the auditions, and if you are serious about making a career, you go to every audition there is.  That means maybe three or four times a week you’re shelling out twenty-five bucks for a pianist just to play three arias for you.  So it gets expensive, especially when you have no income."

I have made this into my personal mantra as I begin my real walk into this career.  For instance, at this point in the year, I am applying to about 20 different programs.  Ultimately more will come up as well as I continue through the season.  If you think about it, it is a numbers game like many things in life are.  When I first auditioned as a baritone nearly four years ago I only applied to about five programs and, while I managed to be granted auditions at all of those programs, I got accepted into none of them.  As an example of some of the odds a young singer faces starting out think about this:

A well-known program may receive 1500 applications from aspiring singers.  Out of those 1500, the company will hear approximately 700 auditions.  Then, from those 700, the company will pick about 25 singers for their program.

These odds seem nearly insurmountable, until you realize that there are hundreds of programs in this country, some of which are smaller programs and therefore receive fewer applications and hear fewer people for the same number of spots.  So, you see, eventually you will find the program that can accommodate you.  I am confident that I will find a placement for the summer during this season and begin my career.

My language quest has been somewhat trying as of late.  I have lacked time and motivation due to everything going on in my life, as I described above.  I am still working however and making progress.  I found a new app for my iPhone which is called "Audiobooks."  This is literally the entire database of LibriVox made available for iPhone.  Any language learners who do not know of LibriVox should check it out immediately, as well as Project Gutenberg.  These are invaluable resources for language learners as they provide you, between the two of them, with tons of materials for Listening-Reading.

I hope to get to another meetup or two before the year is out to see where I am at with my German.  This will be difficult though due to my potentially busy audition schedule.

On a side note, I noticed an interesting tidbit today when looking at my viewership.  I had a considerable spike in my readers on my birthday.  I can't imagine this is coincidence, but I find it rather amusing.  It's like a birthday gift from my readers.  I have also noticed a nice steady climb in readership over the years which is encouraging.  Ultimately my blog is gaining in popularity and I hope that it is helpful or informational to some of those who read it.  If there are ever any questions that any of you want me to try and answer, just leave a comment and I will answer it in my upcoming post.

Strength is coming!

There's not a whole lot to report on the language front this time around.  I am still plugging away and making progress daily.  There have not been any new big breakthroughs.  The only noteworthy thing is that I will be finish MT before my next post, which means I will then go back to Assimil.

My vocal studies are where the more interesting things have been happening lately.  A couple of weeks ago at church I was singing at the 8:30 mass and went for a G4 which I can normally hit in a rough way that early in the morning.  This time around, however everything happened the way it was supposed to:  the F turned on the [o] vowel and then the [a] vowel turned ideally on the G producing a nice, easy, free flowing pitch.  I took this accomplishment to mean that I have begun to build significant strength through my passaggio so that these acoustical things can happen correctly and automatically.  The second thing happened to me this past evening at a rehearsal for an ecumenical choir concert that I am participating in.  We had just finished rehearsing a men's choir piece which took the tenors up to an Ab4.  I sang this easily the few times we went through it without giving it much thought.  As we were going back to join up with the rest of the choir one of the other tenors made a remark to me that I was "one of those high tenors that sings that Pavarotti high C."  I laughed and answered that I was working on it.  It amused me because a year ago at this concert I was told be one of these singers that I was a "2nd tenor" and now after a year of work on my part I am being told that I am a "high tenor."  Ultimately these people are amateur singers and their thoughts on my vocal classification have little merit in my life.  It is nice however to see that my work is paying dividends.

I have come to realize over the course of my vocal studies that things happen at a slower pace for me in this medium than they did when I was a saxophonist.  Luckily I have learned to be patient and trust that the process will get me to my end goal eventually.  When I started down this path as a singer I did not realize how hard I was going to have to work to attain my dreams.  Everything else I had ever done in music came easily.  Now, though I have broken through so man apparent glass ceilings that I have very little that can stand in my way.  I had a goal set in front of me by JRL at my last lesson that by this time next year I need to have a workable C5 so I can work on Faust and Rodolfo.  I take these challenges very seriously and am closing in now an my B4, just a half step away from the famed "Pavarotti high C."  If my voice continues along the path it is currently on I anticipate not only reaching the goal of a workable high C, but hope to achieve it earlier than the date set forward by my teacher.

This fall I am going to be auditioning for a few summer programs and possibly one or two programs for the following year.  The following fall my sights are set on the MONCA competition.  This especially is a lofty goal, but I am confident that my work ethic and faith will see me through.

Linguaphile - Lover of language

This is a rather impromptu post, however I said something in an early conversation today that I wanted to discuss here.

"In becoming a linguaphile I have become a lover of language."

This statement seems redundant I'm sure.  However let me explain what I mean.  One of the things that I am striving for in my journey of learning languages is to be able to have musical moments in which I find myself transcending language and music and finding a deeper connection.  I had this occur on Christmas eve while singing "Oh Holy Night" in the original French text.  While everyone thinks that the song is beautiful in English, it was only through my knowledge of French that I found the true beauty of the song hidden in the real text of the song.  My French is at a level where I no longer need to translate what I am reading or saying, I just intuitively know what I am saying or reading.  This enables one to experience the culture of thinking in the language you are using.  I have found it to be true that people who speak different languages see the world differently.  Let us take a look at the text of Oh Holy Night to see what I mean.  The order will be French (original), then a literal translation and then the sung English version.

Minuit, chretiens, c'est l'heure solenelle, ou l'Homme-Dieu descendit jusqu'a nous.

Midnight, Christians, is the solemn hour, where the God-Man descends among us.

Oh holy night, the star is brightly shining, it is the night of our dear Savior's birth.

Pour effacer la tache originelle, et de son Pere arreter le courroux.

To erase the original stain, and to stop the wrath of his Father.

Long lay the world in sin and error pining, till He appeared and the soul felt its worth.

Le monde entier tresaille d'esperance, a cette nuit qui lui donne un Sauveur.

The whole world trembles in hope, on this night which he gives a Savior.

A thrill of hope the weary world rejoices, for yonder breaks a new and glorious morn.

Peuple a genoux, attends ta delivrance, Noel, Noel voici le Redempteur.

People on your knees, await  your deliverance, Noel, Noel, here is the Redemptor.

Fall on your knees, oh hear the angel voices, oh night divine, oh night when Christ is born, oh holy night.

For me, in performing the French version of this song I finally felt the true emotion of the piece and was free to perform it with the integrity it deserves.  I found the real text to be considerably more moving and inspiring and that was channeled through me as I was singing.  This is the real reason I learn languages, so that my performances may be truly genuine.  Because I know French at an intimate level, I was able to connect to the music.  My love of language grew tenfold that night, because I learned experientially that speaking a different language really does give one a new way of thinking about a topic.  Only through a thorough knowledge of the language one sings in can one truly give an informed and accurate performance.  

End of the Year Update and Next Year's Plans

LANGUAGE:  Well, the year is coming to an end and I think I can successfully say that I have accomplished my goal for French.  In my two reading test at the end of this year I have averaged a 97% comprehension rate.  I do have one more test planned for next week so I can have a three score average to more accurately rate my ability.  Additionally, I feel pretty comfortable in conversation in French and feel as though I can express myself pretty well.  I am very pleased with the last eight months of work in French.  Admittedly, I was not always as consistent in my work as I would have liked to be, but it provides me with goals for the coming year.

2012 brings in an entire year devoted to German for me.  My system will be similar to what I did for French, since it seems to have been the most effective for me.  This includes working through Michel Thomas, Assimil and LingQ on a daily basis during the work week, taking the weekends off from studying to allow things to work themselves out subconsciously.  In addition I will again be consulting my friend Ernest for conversational practice beginning early on in the process.  My goal for the coming year is to be more consistent in my studying - making sure that I get in all three phases of my work, five days a week.  Based on the results I saw with French after only eight months, I am hoping to be even farther along in German by this time next year with the extra four months of work.

MUSIC:  This has been an enlightening year for me musically.  I have grown much as a singer and artist, however I also encountered some setbacks that varied from minor annoyances to things that made me step back and think about what it is I am undertaking.  Overall I am better for all of my experiences as they have led me to discover new interests and paths in which I can explore my own artistry.

The most difficult part of this year was the culminating recital, my first as a tenor in nearly ten years.  I had some successes and some failures throughout the performance which I meant to talk about here but never got around to it until now.  The positives from the recital were that I made it through all of my repertoire without feeling fatigued at the end or ever really feeling in danger of cracking.  The negatives were that I never really loosened up during the entire performance and thus my singing came out pressed and my artistic performance suffered for it.  I blame these issues mostly on nerves from not singing that high in public in many years.  I remember as a baritone that I had similar issues for a number of years until I had enough performances and faith in my voice through performing that I no longer suffered from the fright. 

The other challenge this year has been that I do not feel I have progressed as much as I should have this year.  I take the sole blame for this and have already begun to plan how to address this issue in the coming year.

After my recital, I began to contemplate if this was really the field for me to focus on and began taking choral conducting lessons with the plan of going to grad school for choral conducting.  Much to my delight, I have found that I really enjoy the study of choral conducting and have found myself doing what I do when I become truly interested in something:  researching and absorbing as much information as I can about the subject.  Ultimately this has not pulled away from my desire to perform and performing is still my primary goal, but I am still considering a MM in choral conducting, since an MM in vocal performance is not necessary for my goals.


For the coming year I really need to focus on more directed, intensive practice.  Difficulties abound due to my schedule, namely that I work overnights, however I have to figure out ways to be more productive and push myself if I want to make my dreams realities.  It is a challenge only being able to have lessons once every couple of months, but I cannot let that be an excuse for my not progressing.  This year I truly have to take my fate in my own hands and constantly remind myself that achieving my goals is a responsibility that rests solely on my shoulders and nobody else.


I am looking forward to 2012!  I can already tell that it will be a year of great growth for me as a person and artist.  Highlights of the coming year include planning a recital for the fall and my wedding, as well as figuring out where I will be relocating to in 2013.  Have a happy holiday season and I will be back in January!

A Response

Today, I read a blog post by my teacher, JRL, which dealt with faith.  I found this post to be very poignant, and to a certain extent I felt like it was directed towards me.  With out going to much into the specifics of the situation, my last lesson with Ron was a challenging one for me, and I sense for him as well.  I came out of the lesson questioning whether I had the ability to make this all consuming dream of mine a reality.  Ultimately, my faith in myself got the better of me and a reaffirmed myself to my work ethic and the knowledge that my own perseverance has won out in the past and will ultimately win out again.  It seems to me that things always must become more difficult before they get easier.  Such is the case currently as I am struggling mightily with my voice.  

Things I thought I had finally overcome  have come back and new struggles have accompanied them.  This is particularly disconcerting as I am singing in a recital in less then ten days, and  I feel that I will not be as well prepared technically as I felt I was going to be originally.  The difficult aspect of this situation is that I am presented with two choices:  1.)  Allow myself to go back to what I was doing prior to my lesson so that I can get through the recital, or 2.)  Work as hard as possible with these "new" concepts that I have been struggling with and hope for the best when I get to the recital.  Ultimately the choice is an easy one to make.  Option number one serves a solely selfish purpose and does not benefit me in the least, or my audience.  Option number two, while considerably more difficult at the moment will be more subservient to my final goal and a step in the right direction, even if my current level is mediocre.  In general, one must always move with forward progress, even if it feels backwards at the time.  

In his post, Ron talks about the time it takes for a singer to develop their instrument.  In fact, this is a common theme in Ron's writing which more singers need to hear.  The truth of my situation is that I am in no rush to get out and perform, outside of the fact that I really dislike my day job.  My main goal is to become a complete singer who can be the best at his art.  At 27 I am still on the  young side of this business, but I am beginning to feel some pressure as young artist program age limits are beginning to creep nearer.  However, if I develop my instrument completely, I can still forge a career without the help of these stepping stones.  

The Kashu-do mantra that heads Ron's blog is the perfect statement about my life and my path in music throughout my musical life.  I believe wholeheartedly that I will make it as a singer, and even though I have faced many tribulations in this field already my faith, patience and hard work have always paid dividends in the long run and will continue to do so into the future.

Mid October

I am nearing the end of my intensive time with French and can say that I am very happy with where I am.  I am understanding the vast majority of what I read now and will try and do a reading test from a newspaper before the year is over.  My listening is still a bit behind everything else, especially when listening to the radio, however I have begun to work intensively on my reading and listening abilities so hopefully they will both come up in level before the end of the year.

To increase my levels in those two areas I have begun to use LingQ almost exclusively. I even upgraded from the free version so that I could use the program more effectively.  I have to admit that I find it to be very helpful.  I love the concept of extensive/intensive listening and reading, but it is very difficult to read when having to flip back and forth from a book to a dictionary.  LingQ eliminates this by having a pop-up dictionary always present.  I have talked about LingQ before so I do not want to spend much time here on it except to tell you all to try it out.  As much as I liked the idea of using it for free, I do not feel that one gets the full benefit of the program until you upgrade to a pay version (and come on, it is only ten dollars a month!).

I am currently on the train on the way home from NYC, where I had a lesson with JRL.  Today's lesson was a very frustrating one for both of us I am sure.  Lessons like the one I had today are huge tests of courage and perseverance.  I have gone through a range of emotions in the six and a half hours since my lesson and have landed on a huge desire to get into a practice room and work.  It may be perseverance, or it may be ego, however I cannot have another lesson go by like this one did.  So I will spend the next month fixing my issues and come back better than I was today.

The largest frustration to me is that I spent the last two months working very hard and came in today feeling pretty good about myself.  Unfortunately during those two months I seemed to have regressed on a certain bad habit that I honestly was not paying as much attention to in the time between lessons as I was other technical things.  It would appear that I overdid to the point of misunderstanding a certain idea I was given last time and now I must go back and fix those issues which were not plaguing me at my lesson but came back with a vengeance today.  If this teaches one anything, it should be that we must always be vigilant!  Complacency can only lead to disaster.

End of September/Beginning of October

It has been a bit since I last wrote here.  Some good things have happened on both the language and singing fronts, as well as some discouraging things.  In my language work I have begun reading Les Fables de la Fontaine which are mostly on my level.  I find that the hard thing with reading is that though I know the words I'm reading, I often miss the actual context of the story.  I figure that this is similar to listening comprehension and the practice will ultimately make things clearer as well as fill in the holes in my vocabulary.  I have unfortunately been rather lax in my other forms of study.  I have recently picked back up on Michel Thomas, but as of yet have not gotten back into my Assimil work in about two weeks.  I have every intention of working on it again tonight though!

In other news, I feel that I am to the point now where I can actually begin to call myself a tenor.  For the last month and a half or so I have been working on the Duke's arias from Rigoletto by Verdi.  These arias have stretched me and almost forced my voice to work in a different way than it has in the past.  In the last couple of days my Bb4 has really come into its own and the B4 is not far behind.  I am looking forward to the few weeks, during which time I am hoping to have a few lessons, some coachings and even participate in a recital (my first as a tenor)!

The only discouraging part of my singing life currently has been this week.  My voice has been feeling different this week and certain things that were relatively secure before are not this week, while other things that were not present before are now starting to present themselves.  I assume that this is just some of the growing pains in the process and am not terribly worried by them though.  I'm hoping to get back into being slightly more regular with my updates here, but with the holidays quickly approaching we'll see what the reality of that is.

Encouragement!

I just came back from a quick jaunt to NYC for a lesson with JRL where I received some great encouragement.  I'm pretty sure that I've posted here about how I always feel like I am never progressing.  Well, apparently my brain was wrong!  At my lesson I was commended on my marked progress and even encouraged to begin coaching repertoire and think about auditioning in the fall (next fall, not this one I presume)!  This is great news for me and really gives me a boost.  In addition to this I had just recently in practice session found some of my top notes and was excited to begin with before the lesson.  Now, before anyone reads too much into this, I still am maintaining my work ethic and still have the general concept that I am sub-par as a singer.  The thing is though, that sometimes we need that encouragement to push us onward.

I have had similar experiences with French, where I will go through a patch where I feel I am not progressing at all and then someone who is more knowledgeable than I am will compliment me on my progress between times that they had talked with me.  I think ultimately that this goes back to the idea of being persistent and having trust in the process.  As I made mention of before, all progress that is worth keeping will happen gradually.  The past couple of weeks have shown this to me more than ever.  Between my vocal progress and the books I have been reading lately, I feel that my entire outlook on life has changed to one of bigger time frames.  For the most part the long-term goal is what matters, not the short-term ones.  As long as you constantly check in and are working towards your long-term goal, then you will be on the right path.  My long term goal as a singer has always been to be able to support myself solely by singing.  It would seem that I have made large strides towards this goal in the last four months and I look forward to what is still yet to come.

Love the process and make it your goal!

You are what you do!

"We are what we repeatedly do.  Excellence, then, is not an act, but a habit."

Today I want to break down this statement by Aristotle.  I cam across this while reading ChiRunning by Danny Dreyer and I feel it really speaks to my life.  So much so that it has been my quote of the week.

Part I:  We are what we repeatedly do.

The great thing about this part of the quote is that it is a statement of unequivocal fact.  Michael Jordan became a phenomenal basketball player because he practiced so much that the game just became part of him.  Likewise, the cello is simply an extension of Yo-Yo Ma because of the endless hours of time put into learning and perfecting his art.  In all fields, one can find similar stories that all follow a similar path.  This same point that Aristotle points out so eloquently has recently been elaborated on through the 10,000 hour rule, which has been popularized in Malcolm Gladwell's Outliers (a book which I highly recommend).  The basic premise is that if a person reaches 10,000 hours spent performing a specific skill or activity that they will be a master at it.  This equates to three hours a day over the course of ten years.  The truth is in the results.  Gladwell points out that the number of hours is not a magic number, and that one may become a master before reaching 10,000 hours, but that the process of constant, consistent work towards a goal will eventually reach its fruition.  

One thing that this rule, and Aristotle's original statement allow for is gradual progress.  The road to mastery is a long path and thusly progress will not be in large leaps, but in small steps.  Every once in a while there will be a "breakthrough moment," but these are really just a culmination of many little adjustments over time fusing together to create the current product.  This process of slow growth is not often embraced today, however the effects are considerably more lasting than quick fix practices.  

For myself, coming to realize this slow process has been a lesson in patience.  I first started my transition from baritone to tenor about two years ago.  Apart from my obvious issues of distance from my teacher, the process has been very slow as in not nearly done.  I have just recently come into possession of a high A and Bb, and they are still fickle at best.  The process has been, for me, one that seems to move at such a pace that I do not really feel like I am progressing at all, but feedback from others and those few moments affirm that I am on the right path.  Faith is a key component to this as well, for without faith that I am a singer, I would never have pursued this path this far.

Part 2:  Excellence, then, is not an act, but a habit.

Using the example of Michael Jordan again, he practiced his shot so much over the years that it was second nature for him.  The same goes for Tiger Woods at his peak, or Michael Phelps, or Luciano Pavarotti.  This ties into my last post, but when we put the time in to make something a part of ourselves, we have no choice but for it to appear easy.  If we practice with the goal of attaining the highest level possible then excellence will occur.  It has no choice.  

Aristotle's quote as a whole is really an if-then scenario.  If we repeatedly do something to the point that it becomes a part of us, then excellence is to be expected.  There is a concept in endurance sports that essentially states:  If you want to be a better runner, go run.  If you want to be a better swimmer, go swim.  Excellence can only occur when you focus on a task.  What do you want to become excellent at?

Update - Back to French

I have been rather lax in updating this since my burn-out with Arabic about a month ago.  I am currently back to working on French.  I have foregone Italian for the time being because my level in that language is rather comfortable at this point.  Also, I need to bring my French and German level up because I am planning on applying to grad schools in the next year or so.  For French, I am using Assimil and French in Action at this point as my only learning sources, with the exception of Ernest, my friend from Cameroon.  I have seen my French skyrocket in the last month or so I have been working on it.  I am able to understnad and have basic day-to-day conversations with Ernest without many hiccups and am finding that I can express myself pretty well.  I have somewhat changed my plan (again) and am going to stick with French until I am "completely" fluent.  I will define what I mean by this at a later date.  I anticipate that this will take me at least until the fall, if not until the new year.  After that, I will focus on German until it reaches a similar level, and then I will come back to Italian to bring it up to the other two.

On the vocal front, I have a lesson in the City this coming Tuesday and I am excited to see what is next.  I had a moment of frustration, understanding and excitement all within about 15 minutes of each other today while practicing.  First I was frustrated because I feel like my range is not increasing to include the "tenor notes" at all.  Truthfully I know that I am progressing and that the path is long and slow, but every once in a while I get annoyed.  Second, I realized today that I have to warm up my voice all the way to its top (F above high C) and then bring it back down through the passaggio in order for the voice to find its place where it needs to be so that I can sing.  Finally after accomplishing this I sang through Di pescatore ignobile from Lucrezia Borgia and nailed a high Bb at the end that felt comfortable and somewhat released!  If I was a..."lesser" person I would have just given up after the initial struggles, however I continued to work through and past them and was rewarded with a major victory for my vocal progress.  Hopefully I can ride this momentum into my lesson on Tuesday!

العربي - الأسنوع ٨

I have made some good progress this week.  The most notable accomplishment of the week has been my average study time.  For a number of weeks I have been averaging just a little less than one hour a day of studying.  This week I finally got back over the one hour average.  I am learning quite a bit, however  I have not seen results manifest themselves in my spoken language.  I attribute this mostly to a lack of opportunities to speak with people in Arabic.  The few natives I do know are surprised when I speak to them in Arabic, however they do not respond back in Arabic.  I am hoping that I can wear them down and eventually they will engage me.

Vocally, I am still just working away.  This week has not been one of major discoveries or majors steps, however consistency and ease are coming in more and more every week.

I have found that I have a new transition that I need to keep myself accountable for:  my health.  I have decided to chronicle this here; my plan will not consist of any fad diets or workouts.  It will simply consist of adjusting to a healthier diet and exercising regularly. I will also be exercising three times a week.  These workouts will be both cardio and weight training.  Given my current physical ailments (a very bad knee, possibly a meniscus tear) I will be gradually working up to running for a full hour.  I will record my numbers here every week beginning with this week as my starting weight.  While I will be following a MWF exercising week, my weeks for the purposes of this blog will still go from Saturday to Friday.

Current Weight:  237.4 lb.
Goal Weight:  185 lb.


Methodology Minute:  The Importance of Passion


When I was in high school I was a saxophonist.  I was actually the second best saxophonist in my city area, according to audition-competitions for various ensembles.  I actually initially went to college to study music education with an emphasis in saxophone.  However, when I went to college I was at the bottom of the barrel and had little to no hope of pulling out from that spot.  I ended up transferring out of my first school just a few weeks prior to receiving my letter telling me I was not able to return due to my academic standing.  Fast forward a few years and I am now a voice major.  I began my second college try, this time as a music performance major with an emphasis in voice.  Admittedly, I was not a very good singer for the majority of my time in college.  There are audio clips that support this, however I am not going to post those here today.  However, within a couple of years of graduation, I was being told that I was one of the singers who seem to understand the techniques being taught the best, and that I should be auditioning ASAP.

So why was it that I flunked out of my saxophone program and have thrived in my vocal life?  Was it that I was a more talented singer than I was a saxophonist?  No, in fact I would say that if anything the opposite was the case.  Most people I know have considerably more innate talent than I do in the field of singing.  The true reason that I have succeeded in my current field as compared to my former can be explained in one word:  passion.

When I was in high school the Dean of Admissions at Eastman School of Music gave a speech to my workshop about passion.  The general gist of his speech has stuck with me ever since.  He said that the key to being happy in your adult life is to do those things which you are passionate about.  The most important thing said during this speech was:  "If your profession ever becomes work, quit!"

This outlines quite specifically what happened to me at my first college;  saxophone became work.  I had to literally drag myself to the practice room to practice, in fact most times I simply did not practice at all.  However, vocally I feel frustrated when I cannot go practice!  Even now, seven years into my singing life I relish singing and all things having to do with singing.  I research music and composers, listen to and discover new singers, read books on vocal pedagogy, learn languages, read books on acting, etc.  Essentially, there is not a thing about singing and the singing profession that I do not absolutely love.  Music is an integral part of my day and is present almost the entire day.  This is usually to the frustration of those who have to be around me.  Here is an example to show you what I mean:

I was in Italy for a singing three week singing workshop and was walking through the town of Spoleto with some friends one evening.  As per usual, I was humming or singing quietly to myself while I was walking since no one was talking to me.  Abruptly, one of the people in the group turn around to me and said "You never stop, do you?" in an annoyed tone.  I simply answered "No." and continued on my way.  However the real question I wanted to ask was "You do?"  I just assumed that this want and urge to sing always was common among singers of a certain level.  I apparently was wrong.

I have often told people that when I decided to follow this path I said that I was going to be the best.  This does not mean the best that I can be, but the absolute best.  I still hold onto this sentiment, but it is not out of arrogance.  It is confidence in myself, my work ethic and my passion.  There are generally only a small percentage of activities that people are truly passionate about.  For me these things number three:  my faith, my voice and languages.  If a person can focus more on their passions and less on the pursuit of money then they will ultimately find the money anyways.  The people who succeed are the ones who are passionate about what they do.  Those who fail are the ones who simply ride talent or go for the profession that is going to make them the most money.  My urge to you, reader, is to take the time to figure out what you are passionate about, and then pursue that haphazardly and unabashedly.  If you do this I can guarantee you success in whatever you are called to do.